Feeling stuck?

Feeling stuck is a common complaint among those who desire change. We become frustrated with a lack of progress or direction. Yet this frustration, this “stuck” feeling, is often just a lack of clarity. So what’s the solution?

We often set goals that are nebulous in nature. Goals such as “lose weight” or “start exercising” or “start eating better”. While these are all admirable goals, how can I put this nicely, they are useless. As much as I resist cleverness, the SMART criteria is a simple and easy-to-remember system to goal setting. Specific. Measurable. Attainable. Realistic. Time based.

Specific. Specific goals are real goals. Without specificity we tend to find a myriad of ways around the actual goal pursuit. What does “lose weight” mean? A pound? 10 pounds? Of fat? Muscle? Water? What then? Create a specific goal.

Measurable. Extending upon specificity, we also must have a measure of success. This should likely be some sort of numerical value. If you want to get better sleep you could measure hours or you could assign a numerical value to your quality of sleep. Qualitative data is still data.

Attainable. We want to have goals that we can reasonably attain. If you currently bench press 135lbs you probably can’t expect to hit 315 in a training cycle. Instead focus on a goal like adding either reps or weight each week.

Relevant. Some ppl use realistic here but that is pretty much the same as attainable so I prefer relevant. We want our goals to be relevant to our values as human beings. If we start making goals that in no way support our values we are asking to fail. If you aren’t money motivated, then making more money isn’t a congruent goal. Yet, something like taking on more responsibilities at work might fit you better. And being better at your job will, hopefully, mean a raise.

Time-based. This part is important only in relevance. For instance, if you have a fat loss goal setting a time for a specific weight might be counter productive as it can create an outcome based mindset rather than process orientation. Yet, we can change this outlook by setting time domains around processes. Ideas such as hitting 12 workouts in 4 weeks. Outcome goals are fine if we understand that we don’t really have control over the outcome, only the steps that lead there.

We all feel stuck from time to time. We feel lost and lacking direction. But we can all improve this. Seek clarity, be it through communication or demonstration. If you employ others, push transparency. If you work for or with others, ask for guidance. Don’t let a lack of clarity define your direction. Set goals, ask for help, and be transparent for others. The rest will fall into place.