If nothing changes, nothing changes

If coaching has taught me one thing, it’s that no matter how inane they might be, I’m going to use a lot of cliches throughout my work day. It’s just inevitable.

“What got you here won’t get you there.

“Results are just consistency over time.”

“If nothing changes, nothing changes.”

They just work. They just make sense. And they say so much more than a pile of controlled trials or case studies ever will. The simplicity of such statements belies their intricacies.

These are statements on behavior. On resistance to change. On growth. They speak to our desire to change and our desire to stay the same. One is the face we present to the world. The other is the one we reveal while alone. And this is often the crux of our frustration.

Self awareness is a bitch. Once that genie is out of the bottle, it’s never going back in. And when we get to the point of realizing our need for change, we’ve rubbed the magic lamp. However, if we continue to behave in a manner that got us to where we desire change, we will continue to dig ourselves deeper into that hole. The difference is that the blinders are off and we are forced to watch ourselves dig. It’s hell.

We have to accept the need to change. We have to accept that our old way of life is not working. We have to become the person we say we want to be. No one else can do it for us.

Acceptance is the linchpin on which happiness hinges. We must learn to accept where we are and who we are. And we must also accept that in order to become the person we want to be, we must change. And we likely will need to change a lot. But, once again, if nothing changes...